Mid Life Crisis

Some of my former classmates born in January and February have already reached one of the most important ‘destinations’ in their life when they hit 40 years of age recently. I will reach this milestone very soon, in exactly a month’s time. Since last year, the thought of reaching 40 makes me feel crummy. The thought of partially losing my youth does give me the blues. I had my first menses at age 11+ and I think that this is considered earlier than the ‘norm’. So I guess I will be reaching menopause early too since I was an early bloomer. If there was really a genie in a bottle that pops out all of a sudden and grants me three wishes, I think I will ask for perpetual youthfulness – inside and outside me! Well, laugh not at me for this wish may be granted to me! I am sure you have read about bizarre but true stories of some women in their fifties and sixties miraculously giving birth to babies! I am definitely not hoping for more diaper-changing days, only a fountain of youthfulness perpetually.

As I was google searching ‘symptoms of menopause and perimenopause’ today, I cannot help imagining myself going through the throes of this dreaded yet inevitable phase of every woman’s life. I wonder how my hubs would feel when I am officially menopaused. How is our bed life going to turn out? Will I have to resort to tubes of icky gel on those nights? Will I turn into a loathsome mother and wife with unsavory words spewing out of my mouth when I experience those bouts of sudden hot flashes and suffer from insomniac nights? I shudder to think of that. And I wonder if my hubs ever worried about the same thing that worries me when he goes through a similar phase in his life when he reaches the ‘male menopause’ where his testosterone level begins to decline. Perhaps the both of us will sail through this rough patch of phase together  with me resorting to HCT and he, taking Testosterone boosters! LOL!  I’ll see…