The Homework Years

This is the scene at our house in KL back when my girls were in Chinese primary school. Every single day, there would be a mountain of homework piled up on the dining table — just from school. And then there was another pile of Chinese tuition homework waiting for them on their desks.

Life revolved around homework: school homework, Chinese tuition at home, more homework from the tutor, and BM tuition outside for the two older girls.

Eventually, they got so sick and tired of homework that I think it actually backfired. 😂 I knew they were hiding their homework and not finishing it, but I was often too busy with my own freelance work and running my online shop to check every single day.

Every now and then, I would check their school bags and discover unfinished homework hiding inside. Some of the piles honestly shocked me. 

I really didn't know how to handle it because, at the same time, I knew they were exhausted. Chinese wasn't their first language — English was what we spoke at home, and both their parents couldn't speak Mandarin. So here they were, trying to keep up in a Chinese-medium school while juggling tuition and even more homework.

Somehow, they survived all six years at Kuen Cheng 2, which was a Grade A school and, back then, recognised as a Sekolah Berprestasi Tinggi. Two daughters went on to study at a Chinese Independent High School and survived yet again.

Looking back, I'm actually glad those crazy homework years are behind us. And despite all the struggles, I'm also glad I sent them to a Chinese school. Today, all three of them can converse fluently in Mandarin.

Meanwhile, their yellow banana mum is still struggling with Mandarin and has to use Google Translate. 😂🍌

So I guess all those piles of homework were worth something after all. 😆

Missing My Girls

Missing my 3 daughters just a little more today. ❤️

All three of them are completely absorbed in their own busy lives — university, exams, assignments, dance and skating practices, social life, work and even house renovations. 😅

It would be lovely if they could make a short trip back to Ipoh for a little break, but I guess that probably won’t happen until Christmas or CNY.

But do I regret moving back to Ipoh? Not at all. I love being here with my parents and having this slower, simpler life. It’s just that I still worry about my girls every single day, even though they’re all grown up now.

And today, this photo of my three girls suddenly popped up on my Google Photos. It was taken in September 2011 — exactly 15 years ago — at Pavilion KL. Back then, we were crazy about going to Tokyo Street, browsing Daiso and having Japanese food at Pavilion.

Looking at this photo made me miss those days when my girls were little, sweeter and still thought I was their hero. 😂 Now they’re all grown up, busy with their own lives and probably don’t need their mother nearly as much anymore. 🥹

And then I realised… this must be exactly what my mum went through 36 years ago when I left Ipoh for KL to study.

So I guess this is payback time. 😂

What goes around, comes around, Mum! 

Those Crazy Chinese School Years

Back when my three girls were in primary school, our dining table would be a complete mess during exam season—textbooks, past-year papers, my notes, their notes, stationery, calculators, snacks... everything piled together. It was a sure sign that exams were around the corner.

I would sit with them and revise Bahasa Malaysia and English. Before teaching them, I would first study their syllabus, Tatabahasa, grammar rules, and whatever else they needed to know. Then I would go through everything with them. I made sure they memorized their Tatabahasa, and along the way, my own Bahasa Malaysia improved tremendously too! 😄

Since all three attended a High Performance Chinese primary school, academic results were taken very seriously. Even though I didn't know Chinese, I tried my best to learn the basics from their Chinese tutor so I could at least ensure they revised what they needed to. Those years were not easy.

I wasn't the chill mum who was happy as long as her children scraped through. At the same time, I never demanded straight As. My main requirement was simple: pass Bahasa Malaysia and History, because these two subjects are compulsory passes for SPM.

Whenever exam season came around, I would get stressed too. As each daughter sat for her exams, I revised alongside her. With one of them, there was even a rotan sitting next to me! Back then, I firmly believed in the saying, "Spare the rod and spoil the child."

Looking back, I'm incredibly grateful that all three girls survived Chinese primary school. The eldest and youngest went on to thrive in Chinese Independent High Schools, while the middle one did well in a national secondary school. All three eventually sat for their SPM and achieved respectable results—not straight As, but results they could be proud of.

I would Google free downloadable past year exam papers for my girls, made sure they did those papers, marked them, and go through their mistakes with them. It was hard work.

Today, one has graduated from university and is working, the second has two more years of university to go, and the youngest will be heading to university soon.

Sometimes I look back and wonder how I survived those crazy school years myself. As a "yellow banana" who couldn't read Chinese, I somehow managed to juggle working from home, cooking, school runs, housework, revision sessions, and disciplining three growing girls.

While I no longer have to do any of those things, I miss them dearly now that we live apart. I try to message them every day, just to check in and hear about what's happening in their lives. Their updates always brighten my day.

Different seasons, different roles. That's motherhood.

But one thing has never changed: my love for them, and the fact that I will always worry about them, every single day.  

Exam season eye sore at the dining table.

Cassandra's weekly ting xie list when she was in pre-school (6yo), which I wrote each word in hanyu pinyin along with the meaning and tested her several times before the ting xie.

Treats for them during the exam season.