She Found Her Voice When the Time Was Right

Alycia, my eldest daughter, was an extremely shy and timid child from babyhood right through her high school years.

Even as a teenager, she was too shy to order food or ask for something at a restaurant. Whenever she was around people she didn't know well—especially strangers—she would become very quiet. She hardly spoke to her guitar teacher despite attending lessons regularly for years. Social gatherings were never her thing either, and she seldom attended parties throughout primary and secondary school.

If you had told me back then that one day she would become a social butterfly with a wide circle of friends, I probably would not have believed you.

But when Alycia started college, something remarkable happened.

She began her Foundation programme at Sunway College during the pandemic, so all her classes were conducted online. When physical classes finally resumed, she started spending time with her course mates. That was the beginning of a beautiful metamorphosis.

Slowly but surely, she emerged from her shell.

The quiet, timid girl transformed like a caterpillar becoming a butterfly. She gained confidence, became more comfortable interacting with others, and started building meaningful friendships. Before long, she had friends from every stage of her life—primary school, secondary school, tuition centres, Pre-University, university, and church.

Perhaps it was the college environment. Perhaps it was the people she met. Or perhaps she simply reached a stage in life when she was ready to spread her wings.

Today, Alycia is a confident, sociable young woman with a wonderful network of friends. The transformation has been nothing short of amazing.

Her journey taught me an important lesson: children develop at different rates.

If you have a child who is quiet, socially awkward, struggles with social skills, or even has selective mutism, don't lose hope. Not every child blossoms at the same time. Some flowers bloom early, while others take a little longer.

Given the right environment, the right people, and the right timing, they may surprise you one day. Growth often happens quietly and gradually, until suddenly you look back and realise how far they have come.

Sometimes, all they need is the space to grow into themselves—on their own terms and in their own time.