Rascal #2 made my blood boil yesterday morning. I was in the wet kitchen when she walked in. When I went out to the dry kitchen, I told her to close the mozzie netting door, to which she replied me rudely with furrowed eyebrows and a pissed off glare: "Huh!! Why always ask ME to do things? You think what, you think I'm your assistant ah?" This is not the first time she answered me or my mil or my mum or other adults rudely. I gave her a good piece of my mind and told hubs about it later. Hubs then chided her off and told her to apologize to me, to which she cried and ran to me saying sorry and hugging my legs. Lately, whenever I ask her to pick up her toys or anything that she had messed up with, she will answer me rudely and give tons of excuses to shirk responsiblity or ownership.
I wonder what has become of my #2, who used to be so sweet and lovable. Is the arrival of Baby C to be blamed for her transformation into a little monster? Or is this just her inborn character? Or is it simply because she is a middle child and this is just plain middle-child syndrome? Many of my friends tell me that this fler has 'character' and a strong personality. I don't know, I just hope that she will not transform into a wayward, problematic teenager and adult.
9 comments:
U have found the way to overcome this worldwide dilemma...in your other blog u had them write stuff down. Do the same...give each child chores to do, have it written down, or use pics eg drawing of the door to be closed or toys to be put away etc. Even baby C can help with putting toys away. If their duties aren't down, then withold privileges like computer or toys/games/outdoor play etc.
It's not middle child syndrome. My only child Amber is like that too, bears similiar resemblance to Sherilyn. Likes to play with my hair, tie my hair,, twiddle with my clothing and of worst lately, shouts at me and 'jeling mata'. This kinda kids needs patience, patience and more patience.. haih.. but despite all these, I look at her good points, she strong willed and will grow up to be a very confident person. Hugs to Sher !
yes i have to agree with coffeesncookies as i was going 2 say rye li is also very rude to me lately. i dont let her get away with it though. i'm guessing they like to test their limits with us and see how far they can get away with it. we just need to drill in them good manners and all.
btw, not all middle child will be problematic adults later on ya. ;) just continue doing wht ur doing, giving her the attention she needs. she will make you real proud for sure.
I will STOP and give her lecture at that spot. I would usually go like this, "HAH?!" "Can you stay that one more time?" My girl will usually stop and give me an unhappy look. I'll kept on, " do you want a number TWO ( a pinch) or number FIVE ( a smack)?"
Then I'll demand her to say SORRY right at that moment. and ask her to repeat after me, "Sorry mum. I'll help you close the door. I will not make mama angry. I love you mum...." Then after that she is happy and I am happy...
And of course I would usually tell hubby afterwards in front of her, and show her how silly she was, and we would all have a good laugh.
I think it's a little more tricky with no.2... :)
It could be due to the combination of being middle child and also the arrival of younger sibling. To me, your rascal #2 wasn't that bad, at least she came back with apologize and hug your legs at the end.
Indeed she is a kid with 'character'. Shireen, I read from a parenting book that kids with character are superbly smart that it's hard for the parents to know what are in their minds sometimes. Talk to her more perhaps? Sher's a very sweet girl nonetheless.
When I looked at my sister's 3 daughters, the first and the last gave her the most problems. The middle child is great if compared to the first and the last. Overall, 3 of them are rude. My son is 12 years old, and getting rude each day. Donno if this is a phrase they are going through. Kids nowadays are different compared during our times when we were their age. Back then if we were rude, we kena slap ( but I never kena lah.)
Parenting is totally different from our parents' times. How our parents used to deal with us is no longer the same on how we are dealing with our kids anymore. But I am glad that at least you and I or the rest of the mommies came from an era where we were given the opportunity to experience the old and the new. We were at the middle of the old and the new. Therefore, it makes us rather ignorant when it comes to parenting because of the changes. Our children missed out the old, and they are into a new era since they came to this world. For example, ITech is norm to them, but we need to keep learning about ITech because when we came to this world, electronic typewriters was an in-thing. LOL!;-)
YL
hey, i feel for you. i go thru this with vic too, sometimes she can be really rude, to the maid (maybe she hears from me when i get angry with the maid) or to her brother (jealousy... i dunno). in your case, could be because bb C needs more of your attn and probably it's also her character. wat's her love language? what's her weak spot? if you can identify that, maybe it's easier to reach out to her. all said and done, don't be too hush on yourself (which i must tell myself also) or the kid (again, to myself also).
Rudeness and whining - now that's even worse.
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