The Girl Who Hated Tuition

My three daughters had the same Mandarin tutor, Ms. M, who came to our house every week from the time they were seven years old. She wasn't the strictest or most outstanding tutor academically, but she had something equally valuable—an incredible amount of patience. She was always respectful towards me and tried her best to accommodate whatever I requested. Over the years, she became part of our family's life for almost a decade.

Cass, however, was a different story.

She didn't dislike Ms. M but she simply hated tuition.

I made her attend Mandarin tuition throughout all six years of primary school because her Mandarin wasn't strong. Well, what could I expect when she was raised by two "yellow banana" parents? 😄 Looking back, I know those six years felt miserable for her.

My attempts didn't stop there. In Form 1, I enrolled her in BM tuition, but she resisted, always had ‘stomach ache’ on tuition days, and quit after a few months. In Form 2, I signed her up for online Add Math tuition. That lasted only a few months too before she stopped.

Cass hated tuition so much that she finally made me a promise. She told me, "I'll study on my own. I'll ask my teachers and classmates if I don't understand something. Just don't make me go for tuition anymore. I will prove to you that I will do well"

I decided to trust her.

From Form 2 until she completed her SPM, she had almost no tuition at all. She became an independent learner, had the courage to stay back after class to ask her teachers questions, and worked hard on her own. In the end, she did quite well in her SPM.

Today, for some reason, I suddenly thought of Ms. M.

I remembered the times Cass would grumble, complain, and sometimes even say very unkind things whenever she was given tuition homework. She even fell asleep on the table during tuition, not once, not twice, but every single time. Thinking back, I felt sorry that Ms. M had to put up with my difficult girl all those years.

So today, I sent Ms. M a message. I updated her on what Cass is doing now and thanked her for the patience, kindness and understanding she had shown Cass throughout those six years.

She was so happy to hear from me and was delighted to know how Cass is doing today.

Despite six years of listening to Cass protest about tuition and complain about the homework Ms. M gave her, I have always been grateful for Ms. M's patience and perseverance. Looking back, I believe those six years of Mandarin tuition gave Cass a solid enough foundation to survive the demanding Chinese Independent High School that she later attended. While she may not have appreciated it then, I know those lessons played a part in helping her get through those challenging school years.

Photo below - Ms M with my 3 girls in 2014. Alycia was 11, Sherilyn was 9 and Cass 6.